Insults and replies

Ordinary pirates -- Captain Rottingham

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Part 1: Ordinary pirates

Insult: Every enemy I've met I've annihilated!
Reply: With your breath, I'm sure they all suffocated.

Insult: You're as repulsive as a monkey in a negligee.
Reply: I look THAT much like your fiancée?

Insult: Would you like to be buried or cremated?
Reply: With you around, I'd prefer to be fumigated.

Insult: Heaven preserve me! You look like something that's died!
Reply:The only way you'll be preserved is in formaldehyde.

Insult: I'll skewer you, like a sow at a buffet.
Reply: When I'm done with YOU, you'll be a boneless fillet!

Insult: Killing you would be justifiable homicide.
Reply:Then killing you must be justifiable fungicide.

Insult: En garde! Touché!
Reply:Oh, that is so cliché!

Insult: Throughout the Caribbean my great deeds are celebrated!
Reply: Too bad they're all fabricated.

Insult:When your father first saw you, he must have been mortified.
Reply: At least mine can be identified.

Insult: You can't match my witty repartee.
Reply: I could, if you would use some breath spray.

Insult: I can't rest until you've been exterminated!
Reply: Then perhaps you should switch to decaffeinated.

Insult: You're the ugliest monster ever created.
Reply:If you don't count all the ones you've dated.

Insult: I'll leave you devastated, mutilated and perforated.
Reply:Your odor alone makes me aggravated, agitated, and infuriated!

Insult:Coming face to face with me must leave you petrified.
Reply:Is that your face? I thought it was your backside!

Insult:I'll hound you night and day!
Reply: Then be a good dog. Sit! Stay!


Part 2: Captain Rottingham

Insult: Your stench would make an outhouse cleaner irritated!
Reply: Then perhaps you should switch to decaffeinated.

Insult:When I'm done, your body will be rotted and putrefied!
Reply: Then killing you must be justifiable fungicide.

Insult:Your lips look as they belong on the catch of the day!
Reply:When I'm done with YOU, you'll be a boneless fillet!

Insult:You're a disgrace to your species, you're so undignified!
Reply:At least mine can be identified.

Insult: Your looks would make pigs nauseated.
Reply:If you don't count all the ones you've dated.

Insult: My attacks have left entire islands depopulated!
Reply: With your breath, I'm sure they all suffocated.

Insult: You have the sex appeal of a Shar-Pei.
Reply: I look THAT much like your fiancée?

Insult: My skills with a sword are highly venerated.
Reply:Too bad they're all fabricated.

Insult: You'll find I'm dogged and relentless to my prey!
Reply: Then be a good dog. Sit! Stay!

Insult: I can't tell which of my traits has you the most intimidated.
Reply: Your odor alone makes me aggravated, agitated, and infuriated!

Insult: I give you a choice. You can be gutted, or decapitated!
Reply:With you around, I'd prefer to be fumigated.

Insult:Nothing can stop me from blowing you away!
Reply: I could, if you would use some breath spray.

Insult: I have never lost a mêlée!
Reply:You would have, but you were always running away.

Insult: Never before have I faced someone so sissified.
Reply: Is that your face? I thought it was your backside!

Insult:Nothing on this earth can save your sorry hide!
Reply:The only way you'll be preserved is in formaldehyde.

Insult: Your mother wears a toupee!
Reply: Oh, that is so cliché!


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This walkthrough: Copyright © 1998 Joonas Linkola. Not to be reproduced without permission.
Curse of Monkey Island: ™ & © 1997 LucasArts Entertainment Company LLC